Work In Progress

getting funky

thanks, first of all, for the love the other day. i heard from people very dear to me, and to know that i'm not alone in these feelings is comforting. cutting ties and letting go of expectations is scary and, frankly, really sad. i'll grieve for awhile. but in the end, i can't keep wishing on stars that will never fall.

to cheer myself up, i did something yesterday that i've wanted to do for 20 years.

i got a tattoo.

interestingly enough, the one i've wanted to get for years ... all four of our zodiac symbols on my back ... is not the route i went first time out. which means i have to go back and get another. lucky for me, i have two others planned, and a third isn't out of the realm of possibility.

(they really are like potato chips: you can't have just one.)

anyway, the place opened up at noon, and i was there waiting at 12:32.

finally the "open" light came on, and i hopped out of the car and ran in. after waiting awhile for the guy, andrew, to re-sketch my sketch and get it prepped, it was finally time.

i asked him how many people back out at the last minute on their first one. he said not as many as you might think.

and then he started.

and it was amazing. the sense of freedom and relief and excitement was overwhelming. i was giddy.

the owner of the parlor came over to chat while the tattoo was going on, and asked me why i was getting one now. i said that i'd wanted one for 20 years, and had refrained for all of those  years because i was stuck in this cycle of being the "good girl." it was the same cycle that propelled me to not double pierce my ears until i was 18 like my mom said, to go to a college i didn't want to attend, to have one of the most boring weddings on the face of the planet, to never ruffle feathers, to always be responsible and polite and helpful, to not do the things that were risky or might be regrettable. and at 39, i was done with that and ready to take ownership of my life and the remaining years i have in it.

and in the end, i had what i wanted ... an "m" and an "m" (marc and michele) on either side of an ampersand made of an arrow and a heart.

and the owner looked at it and said, "no one will ever give you trouble for a tattoo that says, 'mom.'"

and i said, "huh. how about that."

and now i kinda love it all the more. i love my husband and our life together enough to brand myself visibly with it. but it turns out i am also showing the world who i am - a mom. and that's pretty okay, too.

another amazing thing about this "mom" gig: i now have a child old enough to be sharing music with me and getting me totally hooked on stuff i wouldn't have otherwise heard. and then i go digging around for that band and find something pretty awesome. so, thanks for that, henry!

 

dump, literally and metaphorically speaking

i'm so on the fence about continuing the blog or letting it go. however, it's been the only place since the book where i keep track of what's going on in our lives and writing things down. the book - and surrounding life circumstances at the time - burned me out. my printer stopped playing nice with my computer and hasn't worked since, so i stopped scrapping at home. we moved, none of my stuff has gotten officially unpacked and made usable, so i lack the desire to dig through paper. and the ongoing, underlying theme here is "my stuff comes last," but without the blog, the kids' stories would be forgotten.

metaphorically, that's the underlying theme of my life right now: my stuff comes last. and it's time for some changes.

at my age (39 years, four months, 18 days), i'm finally ready to say "i'm done" with people who don't care. i've tried my entire life to find friends, to nurture relationships, to find people who care about spending time with me, and i'm officially done. the dead weight will be cut.

the emotional burden of trying for 39 years to find people who give a shit about me is taking its toll, and i'm done. i wash my hands of those people with whom i have tried  and failed to ignite any spark of giving a damn.

my life is small, but busy. and i understand that others have lives that are also busy. however, i am always willing to work out a time - regardless of how brief - to spend with those i enjoy and want in my life. the time has come, though, to erase the names in my book who do not choose to give that time to me. a person can try only so much, you know? either people want you in their life or they don't, and it has become abundantly clear that i have more people who feel the latter for me and my family.

so be it.

i'm done.

and hopefully this weight and soul-sucking "what the hell am i doing wrong?!" that i've been feeling for weeks months years will go away and i can just go about living my life with the small little group who have chosen me. and if that's literally just my husband and children (while they have no choice because they are under 18) then okay. at least they are fun.

i am who i am. like it or, apparently, don't. i am a grown up and will no longer be someone i'm not in order to sustain a relationship based on needing to be that person. and relationships that are gone because i'm no longer playing a game are relationships i no longer want and need in my life.

i've come to accept that some people have active, loyal circles of friends and family who choose to do things together and be with each other, and some don't. and so we will be our own island, having our own fun and making our memories together, and we will be enough. marc and i have talked often about how our role seems to be that of "give," and everyone around us is in the "take" position. one-sided relationships are unsustainable, and without anyone in our lives who "give" to and are supportive of us, we're tapped out. we can't always be the ones to call and try to make plans and stay in touch.

which is fine. we're busy anyway, and the coming months won't let up, either.

and what have we done over the past month, when i've updated absolutely nothing?

well, we got some snow.

and marc's parents came to visit and went to the kids' school carnival.

and came to henry's last band concert, after which we exited the school into even more snow.

and we took them to a great authentic ecuadorian restaurant in minneapolis.

and then we had to say goodbye, about which harper was not thrilled.

but she eventually came to terms with it.

and then we had more snow.

so i used some of the 5,348 antique blue canning jars that i got from my grandma and brought spring indoors.

and then it snowed a little more just to spite me.

club swim season started up again.

and it finally became nice enough outside for harp and her friends to race and jump and enjoy springtime while waiting for the school bus.

then the weather changed again and now we can't seem to get out of the 50s or away from the rain.

but harp finally has a big Big Girl bike and rides it regardless of weather.

and henry test drove a teen cross fit class to see if adding some dry land work of his own might be good for the summer.

and there were field trips and play dates and other things.

and less than two weeks until summer vacation.

but we have big plans for the summer, and i kinda can't wait to get started. especially with less burden and frustration and sadness on my heart. looking forward to trying peace in my life for a change ... assuming i can really make it stick.

letting go is the hardest part, isn't it?

puerto rico, part 8,394

(is she ever going to be done with spring break?!)

i had hopes that spring would arrive in minnesota and i could move on to lovelier things. but as it stands, it's snowing. right now. outside. on may 3. holding on to spring break helps dampen the urge to curl into the fetal position under a blanket and sleep until june.

but this is it. i promise. last bit of spring break. and, as i said a month ago earlier: i saved the nerdy for last.

there were a handful of things we wanted to do while we were in puerto rico, and for several reasons we ended up not doing any of them. however, the one thing we DID do was check out the arecibo observatory.

now, geeks and nerds and sci fi fans may recognize arecibo from the movie "contact" with jodie foster.

being a family of geeks, nerds, and sci fi fans, being on the same island as arecibo and having the ability to go see it was a no-brainer.

we rented a car and drove an hour to arecibo, then another half an hour up into the hills to get to the observatory. the higher up and farther away from the highway we went, the more marc said it reminded him of ecuador. especially when we had to slow down for roosters to cross the road.

but after lots of tight turns and potholes and near misses with oncoming trucks, we finally saw our first glimpse of the observatory.

and our little geek-nerd-sci fi hearts went pitter pat.

we parked and had to walk up a steep hill to get to the actual building. along the way were these amazing art pieces of the planets ...

we paid admission then spent the next hour or so reading all of the information about the radio telescope, astronomy, astrophysics, physics, meterology, and other sciences that i bet would have made much more sense to us in high school and college. but the kids dug it, and henry reverted into mr experiment mode like he always does in museums and science centers.

we checked out a scale model of the telescope and read about how it worked, then watched a 20 minute movie in spanish about the history of the telescope (i caught about every 14th word ... harper was, shall we say, "a little bored") ...

and then it was time.

and our nerd-geek-sci fi hearts beat faster still.

as the nerdiest-geekiest-sci fiest member of our group, marc needed a moment alone with the telescope.

once we'd had our fill ... and then stuck around to listen to the tour guide ... and then had more of our fill, the kids were ready to check out the gift shop. two electromagnetic knickknacks later, it was time to go. except it was raining. so we decided to wait it out before trekking back down that steep hill. once the rain slowed to a sprinkle, we headed out. only to get caught two minutes later in a downpour.

we waited in a shelter for several minutes before deciding the rain wasn't going to stop. so we made a run for the next shelter.

after waiting there a few more minutes - soaked and shivering - we said, "screw it" and walked the rest of the way down to the car.

the drive back to the highway was made more interesting by the flooding roads and floating roosters, but we survived. and harper promptly passed out for the remainder of the trip.

it was a great day, and we capped it - and the week - off with an amazing steak and popovers as big as our heads at the ritz carlton down the beach.

the next morning, we packed up and said goodbye to our vacation. we were ready to be home, but so grateful for the amazing week together.

... however ...

marc thought the kids would want to spend our last day in puerto rico swimming and soaking in a final day of sun and beach, so he'd booked our return flight for 4:30. but they didn't want to swim. they wanted to lay in bed and watch cartoon network.

hmm.

so ...

finally it was time to go.

we were flying a different carrier home than on the trip down, and marc didn't have any status with this airline and was told that the plane was full and the four of us would be sitting separated in different parts of the plane. that wasn't going to work. (i've told you about how fun harper can be? imagine being a total stranger on a four-hour flight with that sitting next to you. i would have allegedly felt really badly about putting someone through that.) so marc made friends with a ticket agent when we checked in, discovered the plane was not, in fact, full, and got us seats in the row just behind first class. tons of leg room. again, it was me and the kids ... and marc across the aisle. (i always get stuck with that job.) but we had some wiggle room. and a bathroom with a broken door was literally right in front of us, so i had fun watching a parade of people get stuck in the bathroom.

when marc changed our seats before leaving puerto rico, he opted to pay a little extra to get us all in first class for the trip from charlotte to minneapolis. settling into those leather seats at 9 p.m. after a long week, and a longer day, for a four hour flight was heaven.

but then harper went into "it's late and i'm tired and i just want to be home" mode.

and started to ask if we were ever going to take off.

and the minute we did, every light in first class went off and everyone fell asleep. including my child who never sleeps anywhere.

and she slept the whole way home.

(and i was the lone pain in the butt passenger who kept her light on and read the whole time. not sure where harper gets the "doesn't sleep" thing ...)

and getting home was so, so good.

and with that, spring break - finally - comes to a close.

puerto rico, part three-and-a-half

i left you hanging, didn't i? marc's parents were visiting over the weekend, it snowed again. and then again. my car went out of commission ... again. it was a full, stressful, busy week.

in light of that, i'm not going to get into the nerdy geeky cool thing we did on our last day. today i'm just going to leave you with your moment of zen, let's say. our thursday evening spent walking on the beach and collecting shells.

we'll get to the nerdy cool stuff in a day or two and finally be done with spring break. it's time, right?

there you have it.

namaste.

puerto rico, part 3

before i share happy, sunny pix, i just have to say that my heart goes out to boston and all of those who were involved, directly or indirectly. boston is one of those cities that i am inexplicably in love with ... it's like i must have lived there in a past life or something, and felt at home the minute i first set foot in it. five years ago, i was in boston with marc while he was on business, and managed to end up at the ticker tape parade for the celtics after they won the nba championship. i was with marc's uncle, his cousin, and his cousin's girlfriend, and we stood, literally, across the street from where the first bomb went off on monday. it could have happened just like that: same place, same crowds, same happy ignorance of anything but celebration and pride.

and to whomever did this: if you had some big point you were trying to make, stop being a coward. own up to what you did, get your sick "credit," and tell us what the point was. because right now, all we think is that you are a heartless chickenshit.

and with that, puerto rico:

after our day in san juan and my night of courting the porcelain god, we decided to take it easy on tuesday. which turned into taking it easy on wednesday, too. the kids only wanted to swim in the ocean, look for shells, swim in the pool, and siesta. oh, we got really good at the siesta.

and all i have to show for it are iphone pix ... that's how lazy it was.

we would head down to the patio restaurant, grab a table, then grab breakfast at the buffet. every morning: i had an omelet, harper had pancakes, henry had bacon, and marc had juice. (and sometimes fruit and a pastry.) we would then wander the beach for awhile, ease into the day, and head too far into the surf looking for shells. which resulted in losing half of our wardrobe to salt, sand, and water. you would think we would have learned to wear swimsuits to breakfast.

and there was the one morning when, after breakfast, we ran into the coconut man. he walks several miles up the beach early in the morning, climbing palm trees and chopping down coconuts, then on his return trip he sells the coconuts - chops them open and serves them up. just like that. now, harper is in love with coconut but has only had the dried-out nasty ones from the grocery. she was in heaven, eating real, fresh coconut.

henry still hates it. fresh or otherwise.

when we did finally put on suits and head to the pool, the kids and marc swam, and i stayed in the shade, wearing spf 400, a cover-up, a hat, and reading a book.

occasionally, someone would come visit me.

but about that time, marc would say, "let's eat lunch in the pool!" and they would flee ... to the swim-up bar, to order burgers and fries. and i would then get in the water and go join them. and then we'd all swim for another hour or so.

turns out, you really can't enforce the "no swimming for an hour after eating" rule when you're eating IN the pool. just fyi.

around 2 p.m. or so, we'd make the parental decision that the kids had had too much sun for the day, and we'd head in. at this point, we became firm believers in the power of the siesta. the kids would go to their room and watch "tom & jerry" for two hours, i would read and/or watch two hours of giada and ina, and marc would read (no, seriously ... he read a book! a whole book!) or nap. and it was blissful.

(there was that one ill-advised afternoon when henry joined us for channel-flipping and we lost half an hour of our lives to "amish mafia.")

 after that, we'd go back out to the pool until dinner.

one of the days, harper had her other "best day ever!" ... she hung out with an iguana.

we'd seen a couple of smaller iguanas and a gecko just hanging out in the pool area, and harper was determined to see one up close. on this day, the granddaddy iguana came lumbering out of the garden and was walking slowly across the pool deck. harper was very stealthy (as stealthy as one can be while containing giggles of glee) and followed it all around the deck. soon, one of the restaurant workers walked over by her and started feeding the iguana some shredded lettuce.

then he handed harper the rest of the lettuce and told her to feed the lizard, whom he called "pepe."

(and, seriously ... what is it about my girl that makes total strangers just hand her food to feed wild animals? should i be concerned about that?)

but pepe was soon in love with harper and wouldn't leave her side. it got to the point that harper was sitting, petting pepe, feeding him little leaves that she found on the ground.

soon enough, another little iguana came running over to pepe, and then the two iguanas wandered back into the palms.

for the record, yes - she now wants an iguana.

after another hour or so in the pool, we would head back to the room to get cleaned up for dinner. one night we were back on the hotel patio - the restaurant, sirena, made some really yummy stuff - but another night marc found a place online that sounded good. and it looked - on the map - to be about seven blocks away. so we started walking. and it was a pretty walk.

but when the map had us turn down an alley into a residential area, marc had to wonder if we were actually heading to a seafood place. signs pointed decidedly to no.

so we stopped walking, looked up another place, and backtracked about four blocks. around this time, harper had decided she was over the walking, she was hungry, she wasn't happy that we'd dragged her out into this misery of uncertainty, and whatever else she could whine about.

finally, we turned into the el san juan resort, where the restaurant, koko, was located, harper grumbling the whole way.

(i almost wish i had video instead of a picture, so you could hear the bitching and foot stomping. it would have been funny had i not been completely done with her.)

then we got into the restaurant and sat down, and she kept moaning and groaning.

then we ate, she and marc split some mango crepes for dessert, and she decided life was good again.

she's a real treat, that one.

dinner was, again, delicious. we ate some really good food on this trip.

after two days of doing not much of anything, we decided that our last full day needed to be filled with something. so we got a good night's sleep, and made plans for a fun thursday. but i'll get to that next time.

el viejo san juan y el morro

i just left you hanging, didn't it? sorry. i was shoveling yesterday.

so after lunch at ceviche house, we grabbed a taxi into old san juan. the driver dropped us off at el morro, the old fort, and we started our self-guided, self-propelled tour.

and, truly, nothing has changed since we were there three years ago, so i didn't take too many pictures of el morro itself. you can always revisit that here. i did, however, notice something i hadn't noticed then: there are burglar alarms. in the fort. the fort that was built, by definition, to keep people out. and they used the word "burglar." i was amused.

anyway, we started in the center section of the fort and looked at all of the rooms and read about their various purposes. the kids were vaguely interested in the bunk room ... not even the idea of sleeping on wooden platforms in a room without windows seemed to make a huge impression on them.

and the beautiful symmetry that caught my eye? they walked right through it.

harper perked up a little when we got to a window overlooking the ocean, where the best breeze was blowing in. but yes, my eldest was on his cell. probably trying to get wi-fi.

brat.

he finally got a bit interested when cannons were involved.

and when he had to squeeze into a lookout tunnel thingy.

at the top of the fort, the kids found a long-range viewer and thought that was pretty great.

and then they all gathered in one of the little guard house thingies.

and we just kept exploring. and, for the most part, they were alert.

once we'd seen all we could see, we walked into old san juan. where it got progressively hotter ... and hotter.

we stopped at the piraqua cart for authentic, hand-made snowcones. henry got raspberry, i got pineapple, marc got coconut, and harper asked for anise. crazy kid loves anise. she eats the seeds when we get indian food. but the piragua guy looked as her and shook his head. "no. es no good. she won't like." rather than get into a discussion about the odd taste buds of our eight year old, we told her to pick something else. so she opted for coconut, too.

she then proceeded to grump and pout about who-knows-what and cause us all to banish her 20 feet away from us.

then she started to wander, where she looked at birds and bugs and found a stray cat ...

and she became moderately happy again.

once our snowcones were gone, we continued through the streets of old san juan. at this point, we were all tired and hot and sweaty. harper was a grouch, i was concerned that we were getting too much sun, and i think we all just wanted to head back to the pool.

we reached a plaza, where the kids and i sat while marc ducked into walgreens (yes, walgreens), on the street level of this lovely old light blue building, to get some aloe and more sunscreen.

while we were waiting, we started to notice all of the pigeons in the plaza. harper, being nature girl, finally got a smile on her face and started to stalk the birds.

pretty soon a mass of them started to flap around.

but did you see the guy at the left of the photo? with the bag of bird seed in his hands? he took one look at harper and saw Easy Mark written all over her.

and pretty soon, harper had her hands full.

and then her hands got really full.

and then it was more than just her hands.

then henry came over and offered himself up as Mark #2.

sadly, this was the highlight of the trip for harper. it cost us $5. we could have gone downtown minneapolis with a bag of seed for that.

oh well.

(and yes ... that is snowcone on henry's shirt. he takes after his mom. (i totally had snowcone on my shirt, too.))

we got a taxi for the return trip to the hotel, just in time to see a lovely sunset off our balcony. we cleaned up a bit and headed down to dinner.

where we opted for the buffet inside vs the restaurant on the patio like the night before.

and, after a day in the hot sun, i had a pesto and chicken dish that was swimming in oil.

and ended our first full day in puerto rico wrapped around the hotel room toilet.

es no good.

 

puerto rico, part 1

i've decided to drag out telling you about spring break because we're expecting more snow. like, the potential of 6-10" by end of day thursday. normally, i'd be all, "woohoo!! snow!!" but seriously. it's mid-april. i'm over it.

especially when i have the wee-est bit of a tan. hard to go back to mittens.

so (and if we're friends on facebook and/or instagram, you're going to see a lot of repeats. it is what it is.):

we left the house at 5:30 a.m. easter morning to catch our plane. the kids were troopers and were up and at 'em without any complaints. i think they were excited. we got to the airport, swung by a dunn bros to fuel up (pastries for the boys and harp, coffee and a turkey sandwich for me. i like protein in the morning.), then headed to our gate. marc had gotten us into the "comfort" section of the plane, so we had a little leg room, which was nice.

our first stop was nyc, and the kids got a veeeerrrryyyy distant glimpse of the skyline.

we ate a quick lunch, then it was back on the plane for about four hours. during which i sat between the kids, and marc was across the aisle with headphones and a movie.

so that was great.

harper kept me entertained, though. she finally figured out how to blow bubbles, and proceeded to take a bunch of photos and videos of herself doing so.

the stinker deleted them all, though. i was planning to share the funniest video with you. trust me: it was so funny i had tears running down my face. oh well.

anyway, we finally landed in san juan at dinnertime, in gray and rainy skies. not a great welcome, but the kids didn't care one bit: there was an ocean outside of our room, and they were thrilled.

and if you apply enough filters to your pix in instagram and pictapgo, you can make it look like a beautiful day.

we were concerned that our rooms would be separated because there was no guarantee of getting them adjoining, even though we requested it. it was very much a "first come, first served" situation, and i was terrified that it would be me and harper, alone, for the next four bedtimes. but marc pulled out his platinum status and got two adjoining rooms, with balconies, and beach views. the dubious upside of being a frequent business traveler. it all worked out perfectly.

after a stretch and some time to just relax, we walked downstairs to see what our restaurant options were. there was a buffet inside, or a restaurant that served outside on the patio. we were all over that, regardless of the rain. and when they brought lighted menus to our table, we knew dinner would be pretty okay.

the food was better than okay, though, and we rolled ourselves back to the room to crash. but only after letting the kids get their feet wet in an ocean for the first time. and harper managed to find two really neat shells ... at night. in the dark. the kid's a natural.

the next morning, they were up and ready to get to the beach. after breakfast, off they ran to check out the ocean, and harper was over the moon to find more seashells.

a few hours later, it was time for lunch. we got cleaned up and grabbed a taxi into san juan, where we ate at the ceviche house.

now, marc grew up in ecuador, and loves shrimp ceviche more than anything, so he looks for it everywhere we go and tries to find the one that will most closely resemble the one from his youth at the beach. naturally, when he found this place, it was a no-brainer. we were going to eat here.

we got several small things to share - fried plantains, fried yucca, ceviche (which was good, but not what he was hoping it would be), empanadas, arroz con pollo, and some steak thing. it was all fabulous. totally authentic, and even the kids loved it. we were stuffed.

so, naturally, it seemed like a perfectly good time to head into old san juan to walk around the fort. for the remainder of the afternoon. in sunny 90 degree temps. which didn't end well for me.

but that's a story for tomorrow ...

teaser

the kids had spring break this past week and we actually went away!! i'll post pix and stories over the course of the week, but considering half the pictures i took are on my phone, i need to spend some time organizing.

but here's a little teaser and a hint:

it rhymes with "shmerto pico."

give me a day and i'll be back ...

fauxster

what do you do when you normally spend easter weekend with family, and then suddenly that doesn't happen?

you make last-minute plans for family to come the weekend before easter ... then don't tell the kids ... then let them be super surprised when they get off the bus on friday ... then you celebrate "fauxster" on sunday instead, complete with an egg hunt. of course.

that's what we did last weekend. my parents are usually here for easter and couldn't stand the idea of not seeing the kids until whoknowswhen, so they decided to come up a week earlier than normal. we didn't tell the kids, just in case some wrench got in the works, so there were lots of smiles and hugs on friday after school.

saturday started out as a normal visit - we went to see "the croods", ate some fantastic mexican at rojo - and then harper decided that since we aren't going to get to celebrate easter this year, we'd just make our own. and by golly, there had to be eggs!!

so that's what we did saturday night.

first, i had to run to the store to get eggs. because all of our eggs were organic brown eggs. tough to color.

then we colored those new, white puppies.

as we were finishing up the eggs, marc decided to put on some music. and then astounded my mom by controlling it all on his phone.

that seemed pretty sci-fi to her.

the music started, and we went from the b-52s to regina spektor to skrillex to gangnam style ... and a dance party broke out.

(and i got a chill up my spine when i realized that i could totally see my boy five years from now ... life of the party, dancing it up and being a dorky hottie. *make time stop!!*)

during this time, harper was pouring all of the bowls of color into one and creating a suicide of color for her last egg.

she let it marinate for about an hour as we cleaned everything else up, hoping it would turn out black. it actually came out the most vivid, royal shade of purple. and harp declared it the queen egg.

the kids went to bed, and we told them that no egg hunting would take place before 8:30. the idea of not having to set my alarm for 5:30 a.m. to make sure eggs were hidden before sneaky children could wake and wander filled me with joy.

fauxster might be the best idea ever. there were small baskets of easter candy the next morning, but no stress to come up with something special from the bunny. and the kids - ie harper - were totally okay with that. because they knew it wasn't real easter. and they waited until 8:30 ... actually, we had to wake up henry because he was determined to sleep through the whole thing. i LOVE fauxster.

but up, they did get. and search for those eggs, they did.

harper was especially thrilled to see her queen egg was appropriately dressed:

(albeit sitting in a dish of wine corks.)

the remainder of the day felt like a holiday. the girls baked easter sugar cookies ...

grandpa and henry cracked each other up ...

and marc  napped watched basketball.

we closed out the day with a fancy fauxster dinner of burgers on the grill, and a concert: henry on the trombone, harper on the kazoo.

and that was that. a fauxliday visit that went too quickly. but it was good while it lasted.

dear diary:

there are so many things i've meant to share with you, but i just haven't had a moment to spare.

first of all, my eldest turned 13. i know. you're all, "what?! no!!" but seriously, yeah. he did.

it's crazy, and i'm still processing it myself.

he seems to be going through these adjustments of maturity. much more likely to come give me a hug or wrap his arm around me or rest his chin on my shoulder. because my shoulder is lower than his chin. it's like he's realizing that he's growing up quickly and maybe he'd better get some snuggling in while he still can.

he decided that all he really wanted to do for his birthday was have some buddies over for pizza and to play minecraft all night long. which they did. they started some world and didn't quit playing until they defeated it at 6 a.m.

he is also learning to march in band, and i think he's kind of digging it. he still likes band, but whether it sticks into high school remains to be seen.

henry also finished out the high school swim season with a pretty decent showing at jv sectionals. and at the awards banquet at the end of the season, the coach handed out records books to all of the boys. in it are lists of the top 10 swimmers in each age group for every event ... records going back to 1992 ... and henry's name was listed in the top 10 in every event he swam over the course of the season. ie his name was on the list in about eight different events, including taking the #3 spot for the 50 backstroke in the medley relay.

huge accomplishment.

(my kid, without the cap. he won't wear one.)

academically, henry is also still walking that line between making us very proud and making us pull our hair out. when he's on top of things, he's ON. but when he's off and not feeling like he needs to turn things in, we have trouble. however, his ancient civ/social studies class recently took part in the world savvy project, and henry's team's project was one of five from the two local middle schools to participate in the regional competition, held at macalester college.

the boys did a great job presenting their project about ocean pollution and, specifically, the trash islands in the pacific, during the interview process. then they separated into different groups for a roundtable discussion of world and environmental topics. at the end of the day, henry's group scored high enough to move onto the national online competition in may. pretty awesome.

he's had a good couple of months.

harper has also been a busy girl.

she turned eight. (again, "what?? no way!!" but yes. way.)

she is still 110% her own person, for better or worse. no one pushes my buttons more or makes my heart flutter quite so much. she's spectacular. and infuriating.

for her birthday, she also chose to keep it simple, even though the amount of time she spent deciding on her guest list would suggest otherwise. this girl's heart is so big that she wanted to make sure the girls she invited were all friends and knew each other and would have a great time together. in the end, she chose two neighbor friends and her "very best best friend," cecelia.

they played wii for about three minutes, decorated their own cupcakes, drew a gallery full of art, decorated the rest of the cupcakes because they ran out of things to do, and cecelia drew a mustache on harper. and that was that.

speaking of art, harper has become obsessed with drawing. every day, a new stack of pictures appear. typically, she draws mermaids and dragons. or herself in various stages of growth, as a tiny series of paper dolls that she then cuts out and leaves scattered all over the place. one day, she had a president homework assignment and chose to draw three presidents for extra credit: eisenhower, arthur, and obama. and then she added the capitol and a tree for extra extra credit.

she's been taking a class through community education called "young rembrandts," where she is learning actual techniques and how to "see" what she wants to draw. her skills are fine tuning, and she loves it.

she is also becoming rather musical. i think i'm going to sign her up for piano lessons because she appears to have the ability to pick out, learn, and memorize songs on her little keyboard. imagine what she could do with a full keyboard and knowledge of where the notes are! the other day, she came to me and played a song she had taught herself: the "do re me" song, all the way up to "fa," when she ran out of notes on her piano.

crazy.

speaking of music, her school's class concert was last week, and harper was selected to be in the kazoo band. she thought that was pretty great. and played the kazoo most of the weekend.

currently, harper is fighting a cold and is on day 2 of laying on the couch, snuffling and drinking tea and watching "my little pony."

in other news, the kids just had their first-ever snow day. we got a foot of snow - not normally something that would slow us down, but the timing was bad for plows and school buses.

so while henry shoveled, harper dug out a little igloo, made a pantry, and filled it with sunny d.

and while i was taking photos of that, mario snuck out of the front door to see what this "snow" business was all about.

half a second after this photo was taken, his paw touched the snow, he jumped half a foot straight in the air, and ran back in the house. where he belongs.

later that afternoon, harper wanted to check out her sunny d to see if it was frozen.

it was not. but i told her that as long as she was out there, she might as well get the mail, too.

and that's what we've been up to. or, at least, a very glossed over and abbreviated version. but now i've caught you up. and now i can go back to ignoring you for another couple of months.

xoxo